random

I’m not doing so good with the November daily posting thing, am I? Oh well, better to “wow” you with a random post, like today’s, than posting mundane stuff daily just because.  Forget that I just mentioned “wowing” you with this post though, okay? Because it is Monday and nothing is “wow” on a Monday.

So this happened…

photo 2 (5)

…which has been rare over the years. Corrigan has always preferred to sleep in his bed, eschewing even a comfortable couch for his own pillows and blankie, but lately he is more relaxed about slumbering wherever the mood hits him, last weekend it was the floor in the upstairs hallway.

Speaking of sleeping, remember when he didn’t get any sleep at all? Or at least none of that consecutive-hour sleeping that normal people get?  If you’ve read this blog from the start, you know that Corrigan used to only sleep in 2 hour bursts, followed by several hours of awake time and then brief periods of sleep again, and if the sun was up, he was awake. His game, his rules, ugh.   It was a torturous three years, but it didn’t seem to phase Corrigan all that much. However, on the evening of his third birthday, after a successful and exciting birthday party the kid closed his eyes, slept for 12 straight hours and has been an excellent sleeper since.

Honest to goodness, it happened just like that.

He is now 5 1/2 years old and gets between 10-12 hours of sleep each evening.  Since the time change a few weekends ago, he has been waking in the 5am hour, but he will just play in his room until I wake now, which is pretty amazing.   We tried everything to get that child to sleep and nothing helped establish good sleeping patterns for Corrigan and it was a dark and stressful time. One that I have no desire to ever experience again.  Those years are so foggy to me, looking back, so I am thankful for this blog to help me to remember, though re-reading my words makes me feel itchy.  Do you ever feel uncomfortable looking back on your past posts? It is like hearing the sound of my own voice on a recording, it is awful.  Why didn’t anyone tell me that I should never use my vocal chords again? Sheesh.

In other random news, I took this photo of Connor last weekend with my cell phone. There aren’t too many more Saturdays that he will leave open for his Mom and Dad and I know it. He is a Junior now and his weekends are already busy, and I know that there are only a small about of weekends left between now and the moment he leaves us for school/work/life.

photo 2 (8)

I never remember to take my big-girl camera with me anymore and prefer to challenge myself to make good images with the camera in my phone (and the apps in post-production, because let’s face it, it’s all about the filters) just like I used to do with my 2 megapixel (ha!!) point-and-shoot in my first years on Flickr.  I’ve decided I don’t even need a cell phone for calls, I just want a 14 megapixel camera in a phone-like device, with at least 1 terabyte storage and access to Facebook and my weather apps at speeds that rival that of light travel. Not to be greedy or anything.

Speaking of greedy, I hate Christmas anymore. I know, Bah Humbug, right?

Okay, hate is a strong word, because I truly don’t hate anything in my life, but if you’re one of those people that have been bragging about Christmas shopping since last June, and you keep posting “Countdown to Christmas” things on Facebook, I nearly hate you. At least a little.

It just hasn’t been fun in years. The meaning of Christmas, I stand behind 100% and I do so love the spirit of the holidays, but I am so tired of counting how many paychecks before December 25th and trying to push bills around so that there are gifts under the tree. Last year, nearly all of Corrigan’s gifts came from thrift stores and while I am not the least bit ashamed of the pretty-awesome-if-I-do-say-so life I scrape together with thrift and careful shopping, I did find myself a bit teary last year that my youngest had second-hand gifts so that my oldest could have the gifts he wanted and were things that had to be purchased retail.  This year is no different, only everything is more expensive but my budget is the same. Just like so many others that I know, this time of year brings up feelings of inadequacy.

But you know what? Corrigan didn’t know about second-hand and some of his very favorite toys this past year were those that I picked up for him with good intentions and little cash, wrapped up nicely for Christmas morning!

Years ago we stopped exchanging gifts with family, which absolutely sucked all of the fun away from the season for me, and last year Mark and I had a $30.00 budget for each other. Well, we had a budget, one that I stuck to faithfully and then on Christmas day he pulled out a surprise “wow” gift and made me cry.  Not happy tears, angry ones, because my $30.00 attempt looked puny next to his and made me feel like crap.  Did I use the heck out of the gift and would fight you to the death over it? Yep. Does it still make me angry? Yep.

So when I see a post about “only 4 more Mondays until Christmas Eve!” I don’t get excited like a 7-year old would this time of year, I feel like a jaded, stressed-out adult wondering why brand new xboxes need to be over $500.00 and forcing myself to believe that he might want a new phone, but he will be just as happy with a new sweatshirt.

But you know what does make me happy?

These people…

photo 3 (6)

I will take an evening at the park with these three guys over a commercialized, stressful holiday any day of the year.  Even the little leaf-throwing, photo-bomber there in the top photo. He is pretty cute too, better than a wrapped present for sure.

Before I wind down this ridiculous, inane post, I’d like to direct you to Corrigan’s friend, Sophia. She was born with a UCD like Corrigan and in the last two days received her long-awaited donor liver! She is doing very well though prayers and messages of love and support always go a long way for all involved, so if you would like to learn more and offer up a prayer for continued good recovery, stop over at Miss Sophia Jay!

A donated liver…now THAT is an amazing gift for this season!

2 thoughts on “random

  1. I look forward to each and every one of your blog posts. They always make me smile, or nod my head in agreement, or say a little prayer for you and your family. This one is no different. I feel just the same about Christmas. The only way my kids will be getting presents under the tree this year is because my husband has been working overtime the last 3 weeks. That overtime is our Christmas fund. Our budget for each other is practically non existent. Even money we get from our parents for Christmas presents usually goes to groceries or bills.And every year I keep hoping next year will be a little bit easier. Has not happened yet, but it will. And really, like you said, it’s not the things, it’s the people. I’d much rather have little under the tree with these people I call my family than a whole lot of stuff without them!

    • Maggie,
      It is hard isn’t it? And when someone says “It isn’t about the presents anyway!” I can almost promise you that they have presents for their loved ones under the tree. At least we have money for gifts these past few years, no matter if just a few, there was one year that we had to take advantage of the Toys For Happiness program, where donated toys for the poor were handed out. It was such a humbling experience, one I will never forget. The older ladies running the pickup were so kind, so upbeat, THEY truly embodied the spirit of the season.

      and deep down I know…I KNOW it isn’t about the gifts, but it is hard to avoid in this world today, the gift thing. We’ve spent holidays in the hospital with Corrigan and no brightly wrapped gift can compare to the feeling of a healthy child and sleeping at home in our own beds, I am not oblivious to our blessings, but it is all just hard and steals away the joy a bit, I think.

      Thank you for commenting Maggie, and for being a faithful reader! Keep in touch!

Your comments are appreciated!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s